I fail at getting mad...

I'm sooo tired, hungry and sleepy when I got home around 3 pm...
We did qualitative analysis of Group II and III cations which has a super long procedure...
And we have to do it twice because of the group work then individual work...
My group mates were late so I started on my own...
I had a hard time doing it...
Even when my group mates arrived, I still did it on my own...
They did not helped me...
I was getting frustrated because even after 2 and a half hours, it's still not finished...
And I still have to my individual work which has the same long procedure as the group work...
I finished it aroung 1030 am...
Then, I proceeded with my own work...
I may look calm on the outside but on the inside, I was already panicking...
I have to finish it by 12 noon...
I managed to finish my work by 12 noon but the preliminary data sheet for the group work was not yet done...
I still have to do it because no one in my group cared to write it...
Grrr...So mad, annoyed, irritated and frustrated...
Our group is the only one left in the room and our professor already left...
But she told me to just submit the reports in the faculty room...
While writing the report, Valerie kept on bugging...
She kept asking me if she did the right thing...
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW?!
I'm not the one who worked with that unknown solution and the results for each of us are different...
Then, she started mumbling that she has a class at 12 noon and she's already late...
She keeps on telling me to hurry up...
That's when I snapped...
(It's only a mild snap, a small shout)...
I said I'm not yet finished with the GROUP report and is she wants to go, then leave...
I'll just pass everything together...
And then she left...
Another thing that pissed me off is that my other group mate, Evan...
He was the last one to arrive around past 9 am...
He didn't do ANYTHING...
He just sat on his chair chatting with his friend...
He did not help with anything...
And he has the guts to leave first and did not even say anything...
Even though he's way older than us doesn't mean he can do anything he wants and he can push around his underclassmen!!!
He should've at least told me he was already leaving...
I'm really grateful to my other group mates, Elaine and Chris especially Elaine...
They both helped me clean up and waited for me...
I felt guilty for Elaine because she has a class but she stayed and said that she's not attending it so that we can finish everything...
Chris returned the apparatus we borrowed in which my ID was used as collateral...
Two micro test tubes were missing so I won't be able to get my ID...
He was the one who looked for it, mailing our other classmates if they have it or if they
broke them...
In the end, we managed to find it and my ID was returned...

I totally suck at getting mad...
I'm having a hard time expressing my feelings of anger...
I'm sensitive to other people's feelings...
I'm very careful with my words...
I always think before I act...
Even if I'm so pissed off, I put up with it...
Or is it that I'm just scared to be disliked?...
Whenever I do or say something bad, I instantly regret it then take it back...
I don't like hurting other people...
You might say I'm a such a goody...
But that's what I really feel...
I easily forget being mad anyway so there's no need to make it big...
It's better to be hurt...
No one knows anyways...

Ne, is it better to tell what you feel honestly even if it means hurting others or just keep it to yourself and put up with it???

*sighs*
This was supposed to be happy post...
What happened, Barbie?
I'll just do another post about what happened after my class...
Ja...